College Education for Sale: CHEAP!!!
Today is the last normal Monday of the school year, which means also that it is the last worst day of the school year. For some of you, this is the last normal Monday of school for good.
Have you gotten everything out this year that you wanted? Did you get all [...]
Entries Tagged as ‘The Weekly Idiot’
April 27, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
April 21, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
The End of the World
I still live on campus, so I am cursed to wander Boone on foot.
Because I am lazy, places like Cook Out and Taco Bell are completely out of the question, leaving King Street as the last remaining stronghold of off-campus foodstuff.
Imagine the horror I felt when I found that Daylight Donuts [...]
April 6, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
A Great Thing Happening on the Mountain
Recently, an enigmatic and mysterious organization on campus, calling itself “SGA,” sent out a call to arms concerning our bell tower over Facebook.
The group they started, entitled “Take back our BELL TOWER!” is interested in expelling large amounts of pent-up school spirit through the use of millions of golden [...]
March 30, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
Spring Break
I hate Spring.
It is paradoxical that such a so-called pretty time of the year is so filled with horror, hatred, and other assorted ire, but what are you going to do?
All of the birth, rebirth, and other forms of nativity that occur during the spring months just as easily could have taken place [...]
March 23, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
Playing Through Pain
It’s gotten to that point in the year where school morale is akin to that of a funeral.
Main reason: football season ended like four months ago.
It doesn’t help, though, to turn on the TV and watch March Madness unfurl before us.
There are schools that no one but the team itself has heard of, [...]
February 16, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
Dorm Life Survival Guide (Part Two)
Last November, I published The Weekly Idiot’s Dorm Life Survival Guide, meant to be a useful tool for living happily in a dorm, where, as anyone who has lived there knows – happiness is completely unattainable.
Today, I’d like to continue in that strain, hopefully shedding some light on some other [...]
February 9, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
Parade of Frozen Dinners
Despite the building of the new dining facility, and despite the last couple days of sunshine, it’s still been cold outside.
I’m not sure how God could let that happen.
Walking there just isn’t worth it, especially on the weekends when the Rivers Street Café, AKA “the good side,” AKA “the place that sells [...]
February 2, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
The Terrible Towel and Other Hazards of Steelers Fans
Football has never been my game. I’ve always been a really big basketball fan, due in part, I’m sure, to my obsession with the movie Space Jam. But there’s one thing that’s sorely missing from the sport of professional basketball, and that’s the Super Bowl, greedily hoarded [...]
January 25, 2009
The Weekly Idiot
Meanwhile…
There a number of subtle and not-so-subtle differences between men and women. Women travel to the bathroom in small herds, whereas us guys prefer to go solo, roaming in parties only when there are sports or food at the end of our journey.
Another thing we don’t agree on is shopping. I personally think it’s quaint [...]
December 1, 2008
The Weekly Idiot
Thanksgiving in Retrospect
If you are one of the rest of us, you probably spent last week overdosing on fat and salt, celebrating freedom, liberty, justice for all, and our history of massacring the native peoples.So, obviously, there is no better way to do this than binge and binge until we quite literally pass out. Think [...]
